by RobertCummins | Oct 7, 2014 | 41. Brokenness
Luke 22:24-34
I recently read some articles by Christians whose primary objective was to change the world. In these impressive articles they had borrowed from the best of sociology to demonstrate that the world has not been, nor would it ever be, changed by good theology and sincerity. The world is changed rather by the elite of society – the cultural icons whose ideas find their way into the main stream, effecting group thought and ultimately the behavior that shapes the world. I found the articles intellectually compelling. At another level, I found them deeply troubling.
Their point was that in the two millennium they have been applied, the “piety” and “prayers” of believers have not yet changed the world and that it is not likely that they ever will. The authors emphasized that this experiment has yielded very marginal results so far. It wasn’t said outright but the article implied that continuing on this course might be a form of insanity. (I wonder if the authors bothered to imagine what the world would look like without Christianity?)
Another stream within the church which also aspirires to change the world has made the same observation; that atop seven particular arenas of human affairs dwell the “mind-molders” – those who ultimately shape the world. It is implied within both of these streams that if Christians want to change the world, they need to set their sites on the summit and begin their ascent. I am not in disagreement but I am troubled because of the absence of something in their strategic thinking…..
Let him who is greatest among you become as the youngest, and the leader as the servant…..I am among you as the one who serves.”
This passage teaches that those with aspirations to climb, even at low altitude may already be hampered by the unclear thinking that normally occurs in the thinner air at the summit.
And there arose also a dispute among them as to which one of them was regarded to be the greatest.
I can almost hear the rebuttal of the world-changers, “But we have a mandate to climb. We won’t succumb to the same pride and pettiness as Jesus’ disciples”. Really?
Peter was giving similar rebuttal to Jesus as Jesus was trying to give Peter insight about his case of low-altitude delusion and the vested interest Satan had in his demise. Peter’s attitude of heart was, “No. You don’t understand. I really can do this!”
Lord with You I am ready to go to both prison and to death!
We know what happened next. Peter had to be broken before he could lead. He had to discover that he had grossly misjudged himself. Can you imagine the painful awakening that began for Peter when the cock crowed three times? This was both Peter’s lowest point and the starting place of his revival and his ascent to a high place of leadership in the early church.
I am not really sure which stream of Christian thought I am in these days but as I watch the currents swirling around me (often flowing without consideration of brokenness) I wonder if they are not dreaming that water flows uphill. Can one really lead without being broken? What are the losses within the body of Christ and to the Kingdom of God created by leaders who are unbroken?
One last question. Where in the scriptures did Jesus give us a mandate to change the world? Ok, I suppose it is implied in the original garden mandate to take dominion over the earth. But, does that original mandate today equate to setting our individual and corpoarete sights on the summits of these various mountains of influence? WWJD?
Well…I feel confident God is going to work this out somehow without my scaling the K2 of the Business Mountain. I don’t believe the point of this passage, or the scriptures, is about changing the world (at least not directly). It is about the building of God’s kingdom by those who have (and will) stand by Him in His trials who I suspect will be broken in the process – equipping them to serve and then to ascend.
“You are those who have stood by Me in My trials; and just as My Father has granted Me a kingdom, I grant you (the kingdom).”
There are “little-t” truths and “big T” Truths. Changing the world falls into the “little t” category of missions for me. It’s real. It’s vital. It’s a worthy aspiration. However, I believe the Kingdom of God is the ultimate “big T” Truth. In its eternal nature it is like a vast mountain range that dwarfs the Seven Mountains of Society. One day God’s kingdom’s humble broken leaders will hike on past the high places of the earth’s movers and shakers into an eternal Kingdom. From that lofty place they will ultimately rule and judge this world (see vs 30) with love and wisdom. Then we will see the world changed in earnest. So, whether you are a world-changer or a kingdom-builder, grab a copy of Hind’s Feet on High Places (see warning below). This is Hannah Hurnard’s trail guide to the kingdom summits.
And in regards to piety and prayer as strategies, remember Satan has requested permission to sift us; so (as Jesus’ instructs us)…….”Don’t abandon “prayer”.
Father, the winds of Your Spirit are blowing. Even though we don’t always see where they are taking us, we do know that we are to gird ourselves as You did, to love and serve our neighbor. Help us to identify with the needs of those around us. Help us take our next steps downward that we may ascend. Amen.
Warning; Hannah Hurnard will not pass the sniff test at the doctrinal check point. The bible police will stop you if you are caught with this book. They will show you her rap sheet and prove that she was a heretic. It may be in small print but please read the case notes. They will reveal that she in fact did drift into universalism in her later life. However, prior to her drift she wrote what many evangelicals thought was a theologically sound allegory; Hinds Feet on High Places – a story about the unlikely pathway to authentic influence.
by RobertCummins | Oct 6, 2014 | 41. Brokenness
Psalm 51:1-19
I asked a group of men I meet with regularly if we could tackle the subject of our “essential” natures next time we gather. The topic was intended to direct our thoughts toward that thing that is the deepest and truest thing about us as Christians. It interests me because half of my family in Christ believes they are, in their essential make up, wonderful; the other half believes they are depraved. Welcome to the bi-polar Body of Christ.
Whether we are wonderful or depraved does not seem to be clearly stated in the doctrinal statements of the various Christian subcultures I am connected to but if you listen carefully to the conversations and to the music that is sung you can hear the assumptions that are made on this topic. One group sings “my heart is prone to wander” and the other is singing “God makes beautiful things”. This observation has caused me to have deep respect for unspoken beliefs and their power of influence.
For three decades the deepest conviction I held about myself was that I had a “Jer 17:9 heart”. This is a heart that is deceitful and desperately sick and pretty much beyond help – at least in this life. (Hence, my keen interest in the Rapture) I would then cross reference in my heart to Psalm 51 and see that I am right on track with David, “My sin (too) was ever before me.” And of course we know Paul’s struggle in this area, “What a wretch I am.” (Romans 7:14-25). Then there was the proof of my thought life and my behavior; they definitely appear as witnesses confirming my my depravity. Psalm 51 also impressed on me that the truth would produce in my innermost being a spirit of ongoing brokenness and contrition. Spiritually speaking, I was flying pretty high but in a very low sort of way.
The assumptions I had about my essential nature had a powerful effect on my spirituality. My seeking was driven by a kind of intensity similar, I believed, to my hero David’s, the man after God’s own heart. I would pray “Lord, my sin (springing up from my essential fallen nature) is ever before me. My heart is not clean (believe me, I KNOW) but create in me a clean heart, O God and renew a steadfast spirit within me and please, PLEASE do not take Your holy spirit from me!” If I had had ears to hear I would have heard him say (shout?), “Rob, I did create in you a clean heart and furthermore I have no intention of taking my Spirit from you. Stop praying this. OK?”
However, being dull of heart and zealous in intent, I believed if I could just establish this lifestyle of brokenness adequately, if I could just repent deeply enough, if I could just seek Him with more focus, then I could finally come to know Him as He intended and I would not be such a useless subject of His kingdom – such a perpetual problem child. (Note; if you would like to construct a religious treadmill; this paragraph should be a pretty good blueprint.)
Looking back I feel I was being driven (by that if/then legalistic caveat) not drawn (by a living and loving Spirit). Where was all this intensity and desperation coming from though? The deep (so-called biblically reinforced) sense of my depravity produced a shame and guilt driven energy that was really quite impressive. Few people were as (dead) serious about God as I. I was perfecting the “dark night of the soul” as a lifestyle. I was so zealous I thought God might just snatch me up in my own personal rapture like Enoch. It would be said of him “Rob was…..and then he was not”. (I am barely exaggerating).
Having refined this lifestyle of contrition over three decades equips me to go on at length about it, but some events transpired a few years ago that have modified my thoughts on the topic of our “essential” natures. Today, as I read Psalm 51, I see a snapshot of David’s thinking in the midst of a season of deep repentance. It was taken after he had taken ownership of his behavior as a murderer and adulterer. I don’t think a moving picture of David’s heart would reveal that psalm 51 characterized his lifestyle any more than I believe that Romans 7:14-21 characterized Paul’s.
When I read Ps 51 today, I am at peace that he has cleansed me of my sin therefore it is not continually before me. He has purified me and washed me whiter than snow. He has made me to hear joy and gladness. He has not hidden His face from me. He is not threatening to take His Holy Spirit from me. He has restored to me the joy of my salvation. If I truly thought God wanted more contrition from me I would gladly offer it. I just don’t think a dirge about my old nature is the song He want to hear or that I was destined (or pre-destined if your prefer) to sing.
I believe, as the beneficiaries and heirs of a new covenant, we can sing songs of rejoicing that acknowledge that we are new creatures in Christ, that Christ lives in us and that we are temples of the Holy Spirit. I believe the deepest and truest thing about me today is that I have been grafted into the Vine. I am rooted permanently into God through Christ. For that reason, I have concluded that, by God’s grace exclusively, I am in a wonderful place. God thinks I’m wonderful. I find I am agreeing with Him more all the time. Even (no… especially) when I stumble.
So, as I live in a family that is divided in their views regarding our essential natures, I have taken a position honoring the fact that we were conceived in iniquity (as David reminds us). We were depraved. Even though we have been buried in Christ and raised up with Him, those old depraved natures still have impulses that seem very much alive. Are those impulses proof positive that our fallen natures must remain the most dominant influence in our lives? Isn’t it plausible that giving our fallen natures so much credit empowers them to have more influence than they should?
If I get caught in a cross fire within the family on this subject, I just say that I believe there are “truths” and then there are “Truths”. I report that, regardless of my experience (which is just that; “my experience”), that there is a “little t” truth to my fallen nature. But my new identity is built upon the “big T” Truth of a new nature and a new covenant.
This is (now) my story. This is (now) my song. I am praising my Savior, (now more than ever) all the day long.
Father, may Your opinion and “big T” Truth prevail over every other inferior thought we have adopted along the way. May you help us renew our minds with Your reality. Please restore our identities as children of light, truth, joy and freedom. Cause us to be those whose songs and behavior validate (not contradict) the Good News you came to bring. Amen.
by RobertCummins | Oct 12, 2013 | 41. Brokenness
Psalm 31 (Since Isaiah 61:1-3 was recently used, today I am keying off of this weeks’s Psalm)
For myself and for all those I know and care for, I deeply desire that we enjoy the deepest revelation and friendship possible with God. When I am writing to you, I am doing so with a confident passion that it is God’s desire to help us receive His most valuable of all gifts – His Fatherhood and His Friendship. I also write with a painful awareness that for many of us we do not see this happening and we really don’t know why. We feel stuck. I sincerely pray that my words today will be filled with grace for you.
We looked in on Jacob earlier this week at his all-night wrestling match with God which I think is a picture of our own lives. I was thinking how much like a psalm it might sound if we were to have a move-by-move commentary by Jacob during this struggle and how beneficial to our walks that would be. As I read Psalm 31 today, I believe I heard David’s own heart-commentary on his life and his relationship with God. In his words I hear his pain yet also a childlike presumption that God is aware of and interested in the troubles of his life.
When David says, “In Thee O Lord, I have taken refuge…be Thou to me my fortress“, I hear Him saying, “Lord, it is you and me together in this life. I have no other recourse. My strength is gone. I am in distress yet my times are in Your hand”.
Recently I wrote, “If we will lean into our lives (wrestle, if you like) with the understanding that it is with God with whom we have to do (Heb 4:13) and that in Him, we live and move and exist (Acts 17:28), we will eventually discover that all the give and take; all the pressures of life, from wherever they come, are a part of our prolonged struggle as well as our unprecedented opportunity. I am persuaded that for those of us who will persevere in working out our lives face to face with God; that He is going to restore our identities which are essential in the fulfilling of our destinies.” It is only in perseverance that we personally discover the all-things- work-together truth of Romans 8:28 and the count-it-all-joy truth of James 1:2.
From personal experience, I think I have at least a partial grasp of why many of us struggle in our relationships with God. We work overtime to avoid brokenness by going around it as opposed to through it. At some level we feel our pain; we know our weaknesses and failures but we learn how to keep them at bay. We figure out a way to make life work. The paths around our issues are typically busy schedules, drugs, hobbies; really anything that will keep our minds off the gnawing unresolved issues of our hearts. The more religious ones of us dream we are pressing on as we read the books; as we go to the conferences; as we get the training; as we fast and pray and as we attend and serve in our churches.
And yet, we too often stay the same. Many of us not only stay the same but our disappointments metastasizes into debilitating, usually well-managed anger. From this place we just try to move on and hide away our dissapointment and despair. In the life of a believer, I think its fair to say that if we don’t go through our pain, we will just go through the motions. As believers our hearts are at great risk of becoming entangled with religion when we just go through the motions.
It is helpful to think of religion as any system of thought or practice whereby the doing of it causes us to think that we have gained the favor of God. It is easy, very easy, to make life work in the church. We can go to work serving the Lord with the unresolved issues of the heart serving as the unseen and unholy driving motivation of all we do. There are plenty of benefits available to those who will work hard in Christianity; gold stickers, awards bibles, social acceptance, titles, offices, tasks to keep us busy. However, If we are just going through religious motions in our serving what has happened in the temple of our hearts where Truth aspires to reign and liberate us from every lie the enemy has sown into our lives? If we are busy going through the motions, reinforcing our identities in the church work we are doing, we have become entangled with religion. For some of us, in His mercy, Jesus will come in and kick over the tables where we are engaged in unholy commerce in His temple – our hearts.
The irony is that our pain and our sense of failure, when entrusted to God, face to face, as the One with whom we ultimately are dealing with, over time builds the relationship of security and confidence with God we have wanted all along. The encouraging news is that God wants that even more than we do and has made a provision for us to receive it. Facing the unholy things that drive us (wrestling if you like) face to face with the Lord, is a primary way that He transforms us from glory to glory.
I am not saying that award bibles, titles and offices are always wrong but they can be if we haven’t been moving through our painful core issues face to face with God, move by move, as did Jacob and David and most (if not all) saints who have come to know God well. Our pain is not evidence of His absence as we wrongly perceive. Our pain is crucial to our growing intimacy with God. Our pain often is indication where lies have become embedded in our lives. Our pain can become our place of encounter with Him, the One who is well aquatinted with pain and sorrow. It is our destiny to tell our story of how he transformed us from glory to glory; our own personal discovery of how He was is in the midst of our darkness with us and led us out into the marvelous light of His Truth.
While it is natural to flee the thing that brings us pain, we must do something counterintuitive. We must hold onto God by letting go. We must intentionally entrust all that we are, however bad we think that may be, to God. Those who follow this course ultimately have a story to tell of the goodness of God in the presence of their dire circumstances within and without. These saints can look backward and see the good and strong hand of God taking the worst things of their lives and building things that will last for eternity, all born out of intimate relationship with Him.
So, the seeking is in the resting. Over time, just living out our lives, especially in those times where we are wrestling, our hearts gradually prove, through our life experience with God, that He is patient, powerful, loving, kind and altogether trustworthy. Again, the irony; the heart would have never gained this eternal revelation without those trials. Whether the trial is a “test” or an “attack”, I don’t think it matters. If we process life, and all it brings us, face to face with God, finding His provision, we will have a story as an overcomer. Our testimony will bare light and enemy strongholds will be exposed and conquered. His kingdom will have come and His will will have been done.
Father, thank you that today is the day of salvation. Help us to receive Your love right now, not at some future date when we think we will be more worthy of it. In the give and take of our lives help us to lay hold of that for which You laid hold of us. Help us to even now embrace You in the midst of our circumstances. Grant us Your eternal perspective on our brokenness that we may press on to know You and to make You known. Amen.
by RobertCummins | Oct 11, 2013 | 41. Brokenness
Luke 22:54-62
I am imagining a scene where Peter is being interviewed as his time on earth is drawing to a close. From his prison cell, he is reflecting about His intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. The interviewer asks, “Peter, we all know about your behavior the terrible night Jesus was arrested so many years ago. How do you account for your cowardice and betrayal of this Man you had professed your willingness to die for?”.
Peter, much slower to answer at 65 than he was at 35, looked at the reporter, sighing as if the question had pierced him deep and said,”Thank you for asking that question. I have thought about it much but spoken of it very little. First of all, you are correct, it was a terrible terrible night. The whole day was a series of failures. I had argued with the other disciples earlier about which of us was the greatest. Later, I had fallen asleep in the garden even after the Lord had instructed me to stay alert. Then the mob came for Jesus and I panicked, injuring a man with my sword. Then, finally there was the incident you are referring to. Yes, it was a terrible night but there is something you need to understand. It was one of the most important milestones of my journey with Him.”
The amazing thing for those of us who have continued on in our following of Jesus is that our most terrible failures have turned out to be the places of new beginnings; places where His grace has been able to touch us most deeply. These places of our gross failures have turned out to be the platforms on which God has been able to build most deeply. In these areas, we no longer have illusions of who we are and our own greatness. In these areas we know we have nothing – so Christ Himself can become our foundational-everything. I cannot tell you why, but this is just the way things work out for His true followers. Where we are most weak, He is most strong.
The reporter asks, “What did you mean when you referred to illusions as to who you were? Peter, patiently nodding as if he understood, answers and said, “Yes, excellent question. You see, none of us really knew what this kingdom of God thing was that he was always talking about. We thought it was going to be a government in the earthly sense. We all thought we were going to be chief administrators in an earthly kingdom. On top of this none of us knew our own hearts. We loved Jesus but, at the same time, each of us was envisioning our own kingdoms within His. Jesus knew we would not finish the race well with our selfish motives and self-delusion.”
Continuing, Peter added “That is why the evening you have referred to, as terrible as it was, has also become glorious to me. When Jesus turned and looked at me as the cock crowed, this was my first glimpse of something He had known all along. I was not who I thought I was. I was not the great leader of men. I was the chief of sinners. Although it is painful, my awareness of this has created a dependency that opens my heart to His righteousness, peace and joy – the essence of the kingdom He governs now and forevermore.”
The interviewer asks if he might ask one more question. “Of course”, Peter responds. “OK, what is your advice to me, as a believer, if I want to follow Christ well ?”. Peter is pleased once more at the question. He becomes sober and says, “My counsel is to not follow Jesus from a safe distance as I did the night He was betrayed by Judas. Follow Him very closely. And, do not attempt to blend in with those who do not know Him or care to know Him as I did at the high priest’s home. Instead of saying that you don’t know him. Tell the world around you that you do. Why this is so important I cannot fully explain but we are changed as we identify ourselves publicly with Him.”
Then as if a load had been lifted, Peter said, There is something else that is essential. God is using the events of your life, literally everything that touches you, to transform you into the image of Jesus. If my story is relevant, and I am sure that it is. We are all made of the same stuff. He may expose you as He did with me so that it will be Him you are really trusting in and not some illusion you have of Him or yourself. Yes, it may seem terrible in the moment but it can become an essential milestone in your journey and a part of the story you born to tell.”
These were things that may have been better understood in the early church than today. Our profession is not a one time event. It is a lifestyle of telling others about our milestone experiences and encounters with Jesus. Having a story of our own and telling it will make a dramatic impact on our lives now and in eternity. If you desire to better understand what I am saying, please read: Matthew 10:33, Mark 8:38, Luke 9:26 and 2 Timothy 2:12.
Father, so be it if You must turn Your gaze upon us and provoke the same kind of bitter tears that Peter shed. Help us to recognize the events you are trying to use in helping us appraise ourselves more accurately so that we may trust you more completely. It is a glorious privilege to be called Your children. Do the necessary work in us so that You become our rock and foundation and we will walk openly and in step with You in boldness and joy. Amen.
by RobertCummins | Oct 10, 2013 | 41. Brokenness
Isaiah 53:1-12
Who is God and what is He like? I am not well versed in how the various world religions answer this question but I suspect our response to this question forms the foundation of who we are and what we are like. If someone came to me and asked me this question I think I might say, “Well..I would love to answer that, but because I assume you aren’t just making conversation and that you are genuinely interested, I want to give you the best chance at finding your answer. So, may I suggest you do something first? To find out what God is like, read Isaiah 53. Then read the 4 gospels (at least John’s). These were the people who were best equipped to answer your question. I would also suggest that as you read, you write down your impressions. Once you have done this, let’s get together. I believe your question is an excellent one”.
I would guess most of those who believe in God or a God probably have at least a few common assumptions about Him. Most probably assume Him to be powerful. I wonder how many of them would imagine Him as vulnerable? I imagine many would see Him as a ruler. I wonder would how many conceive of Him as a servant? Perhaps many would see this king as one issuing forth decrees. Would they be surprised at His silence? His questions? Most would think of God as far above and beyond us. How many would be surprised that He came and took a position beneath and among us?
Ultimately, I think our hypothetical inquirer, if he were a reasonable person and an earnest seeker, would conclude that the God revealed in scripture is beyond human invention and, if he exists, would be a God worthy of his worship. And, if He would permit Himself to, he may be met with that initial gift of God’s grace that permits his heart to “yes” – the first word of a brand new language of faith.
Father, permit us to meet those around us who You are drawing into Your great heart. Anoint us as catalysts to stir their hearts with the wonderful news of who You are and what You are like. Amen.
by RobertCummins | Oct 9, 2013 | 41. Brokenness
Genesis 32:22-32
Once upon a time, I viewed brokenness as my cross to bear. I saw it as a gauntlet of custom divined, painful experiences created to refine my character. My understanding of the cross was that it’s intensity correlated to the degree of work that needed to be done on my heart. There have been seasons where the intensity of things suggested that (at least with me) God was working on a wretch of a bit higher order.
I believed that to make it to the finish line it would required a passive kind of acceptance of each thing that touched my life. I could tell you precisely why this was true scripturally – but, unfortunately, not very joyfully. My future, given the health, relational and at times, vocational / financial trends looked bleak. Perhaps you can relate to this from where you have been or even where you are today. If so take courage, there is hope!
Jacob’s future was very shaky. He was about to meet up with Esau, a sibling he had swindled, who would likely kill him and plunder his belongings. Just before Jacob was to encounter his estranged brother and realize his tragic end, he is left alone at the ford of the Jabbok River. It was there he entered into a prolonged struggle with God that lasted until sunrise.
This scene fascinates me. Jacob, whose life is similar to our own, in that his future was uncertain, was anything but passive and acceptant. No, there was NO WAY Jacob was going to waste this much energy without a benefit!
Then God said, “Let me go. for the dawn is breaking.” But Jacob said, “I WILL NOT let You go unless you bless me“.
This reminds me so much of a scene from the movie Patton. Listen to the dialogue between Patton (played by George C. Scott) and his chief aid;
Patton: (intensely introspective) “I’ve always felt that I was destined for some great achievement, what I don’t know.”
Aid – William Meeks: “Yes, sir.”
Patton: (musing – with GREAT pathos) “The last great opportunity of a lifetime – an entire world at war, and I’m left out of it?”
(with GREATER passion still) “God WILL NOT permit this to happen!”
(and then with violent resolve) “I WILL be allowed to fulfill my destiny!”
(with reverence as if this is a settled matter) “His will be done.”
I am amazed at this scene because it so closely resembles the latter part of a season where I had just about expended the last of my reserves in a prolonged struggle with God – a long exhausting season of just trying to endure the obstacle course I believed that He had set before me. I can’t explain precisely why, but something VERY strong rose up from within me too that said, “I WILL NOT permit this season to pass without the specific blessing of understanding God’s heart”. I know this may sound egocentric, but I felt (with a peculiar certainty) that I too had a great destiny; that the last great battle was before me and it was my destiny to make a contribution. I cannot tell you how foreign this tone was at that time to my spiritual ears which had been tuned into a more passive – acceptance band width.
And God said to him, “What is your name?” And he said, “Jacob”. And God said, “Your name shall no longer be Jacob, but Israel: for you have striven with God and with men and have prevailed.”
I feel confident that God approves of our aggressive and steely resolve to realize our identities and to fulfill our destinies. I can hear Paul saying, “I press on in order that I may lay hold of that for which I was laid hold of by Christ“.
If we will lean into our lives (wrestle, if you like) with the understanding that it is ultimately with God with whom are wrestling with (Heb 4:13) and that in Him, we live and move and exist (Acts 17:28), we will eventually discover that all the give and take; all the pressures of life (from wherever they come) are a part of our prolonged struggle as well as our unprecedented opportunity. I am persuaded that for those of us who persevere in working out their lives face to face with God; that He is going to restore our identities which are essential in fulfilling our destinies.
I don’t think of brokenness in the same light as I once did. It has definitely been a part of me and I think it remains within me to a degree. (perhaps similar to Jacob’s limp). I do think the brokenness that comes from the cross changes the heart’s orientation to God. While character reform is surely a byproduct of the path God has us on, I am confident His higher objective is simply to reveal to us His own affection and provision for us.
Father, help us to see how enjoined and inseparable our lives are with Yours. May Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Amen.
