I would encourage you to read this passage. I would love to know if this registers with you at any level.

Hebrews 10:19-26

In our relationship with God, where is the balance between “full assurance” (vs 22) and “terrifying expectation”(vs 27)? Where is that “line”, that when I cross it, my destiny shifts from paradise to perdition? Through the centuries, verses 26-29 have rattled more than a few believers who sinned after their conversion. Its been a few years but to be honest these verses have rattled me too.

For many, who have sinned after investing their faith in Christ, the internal conversation can go something like this, “Oh no, I have sinned again! Am I now in that place where there no longer remains a sacrifice for my sins!?” Another part of us responds, But, I am born again aren’t I? And, didn’t I read somewhere that there is a provision of cleansing if I confess my sins?” This schizophrenic conversation goes on within, bouncing back and forth across this imaginary line, usually taking our emotions on quite a ride and probably delighting Satan to no end.

We don’t usually go all the way from “full assurance” to “terrifying expectation”. Most of us are are just not that great of sinners. Most of us really consider our sins as kind of misdemeanor-level sins and so we have misdemeanor-level repentance and not unsurprisingly, lukewarm gratitude. Consequently, we mostly go from moderate assurance to mild concern and only moderate terror. (Check out Romans 2:15)

And from here, some of us convince ourselves that these defiled, guilt driven consciences that we lug around equate to brokenness, something we know the Lord will not despise. (Ps 51). This type of conscience creeps into our song making it sound more like a dirge and shapes our identity as those with a deep and irreparable flaw in our makeup , which is only partly true. I fear this, and variations of this confession, can become the centerpiece of our belief system and the core value of our identity. There can be a deeper veneration of our fallen natures than there is for our new ones. If, it is in fact done unto us according to our faith, shouldn’t we expect entanglement with sin, if we continually believe and confess the strength and superiority of our old nature?

I wonder how much guilt-energy and shame-motivation has been harnessed and is powering things being done in Jesus’ name? With that thought in mind, I am picturing a Christian life, with the aid of my own memory, where things are playing out like this: Albeit a weak one, I am confessing, not so much publicly, but at least to myself, that Jesus is my Lord and Savior, leaning by the way, far more heavily on the savior than Lord part. In my heart of hearts, with my track record and weak faith, I do not really feel like much more than a tolerated step-child of God’s and I hope I will be acceptable on that day when I stand before Him. I’m confident I am living a biblical life because I am behaving just as Paul said I would in Romans 7:21-24 – I am a prisoner (or victim) of the law of sin that is proving regularly what a wretched nature I have. In fact, this is precisely why I don’t do the things that I know are right and true. I am a wretch. It”s just who I am. However, the good news is that I am busy in the church serving the Lord and this provides me with some security (a little insurance never hurts) and it serves as some salve to my uneasy conscience.

I do not think the church is at risk of loosing this source of free or cheap labor anytime soon. Do you think these consciences are going to let go of their guilt and shame-driven works and just rest? What do you think would happen to that conscience when the salve is no longer applied? Wouldn’t the dread and uncertainty with God move them over the line, further toward moderate concern of judgement?

Carefully read verses 19-25. Don’t these words assure us that the author’s intent was not to frighten us into righteous behavior with the fear of hell? Can you also see how this passage would be unnerving to an alternating conscience; one that “accuses” one moment and then in the next “defends” (Ro 2:15)? The NAS uses those who “go on sinning” as the ones who should legitimately fear. The Message describes this same group as those who “give up and turn their backs on what the’ve learned, all the’ve been given and all that they now know“. The party that is to fear is the one who has totally hardened their heart toward God and has chosen a life of unapologetic, deliberate and premeditated sin. So, if we truly know Christ as our savior and our consciences are still alternating and uneasy, what is the solution? What can we do?

We can first settle something once and for all; “It is finished.” (vs 12) The only remedy for the defiled conscience was effected at the cross. Then, we can heed the council of scripture to “enter in” to the Holy place. The door or the veil to that sacred place was permanently removed for God’s children. We are to live with the awareness that there is no line out there to cross where sudden judgement may befall us. Even If it it did exist, it is redundant because His true children are not tempted to go out and see how much they can get away with before they tilt the scale. True children instinctively shun sin and are disturbed by it. The new nature is predisposed toward righteousness and will flourish when it is encouraged with grace. Alternately, the flesh flourishes when dealt with by the Law.

If we are Christians, who are captives of besetting sins, or just joyless souls who are working where they should be resting, let’s try a new approach in our battle. First of all, If (no, when) we sin, let’s not think of it as a misdemeanor. Let’s just quickly acknowledge that any of our sins, however small they may seem, were sufficient to necessitate that Jesus suffer and hang upon a cross; and then, let us confess it openly. This includes the sins of bitterness, judgements, angry words, unforgiveness, gossip – those sins of the heart that we can hide or excuse because, over time, they have become normative to us in our religious hearts and in our religious cultures.

Next, let’s elevate, even if at first it is just by faith, our understanding and confession of our new identity which is actually Christ Himself – the hope of glory. In the long run I predict that we will be more victorious over our sin by agreeing with God on this matter, confessing that we are new creations instead of always incorrectly interpreting Paul in Romans 7 as permanently casting himself and us as victims, whose identities are primarily driven and dominated by the flesh and therefore opposed to God. This would be like Paul teaching that the war he referred to that was being waged within Him, was regularly and naturally won by his flesh over the Spirit of the resurrected Christ within him. I don’t think so.

Father, help us to find those with whom we can assemble – who are able, by way of their example, to demonstrate what sincere hearts living in full assurance look like. Help us to build and sustain growing communities of grace saturated men and women who are innovators in encouragement. Together, we will hold fast our confession of hope without wavering, for You who promised are faithful. We refuse to throw away our confidence, which is going to have a tremendous reward on that Great Day. With full assurance of faith, Your love having cast out all our fear, we will look forward to Your blessed return. Amen.