Job 42:1-6
Job is confessing the folly of babbling about things far beyond him, wonders way over his head, things about God that he had picked up second hand. Job’s admission is a bit concerning to someone who records as many words as I have of late especially since Proverbs tells us words should be used very wisely and that too many of them lead unavoidably to folly and sin. And yet…..we are also told that they can be refreshing and life giving. Matthew 10:27 tells us;
What I tell you in the darkness, speak in the light; and what you hear whispered in your ear, proclaim upon the housetops.
I pray after these 38 years of following him that I am beginning to know the difference between babbling and proclaiming, from going on about a scriptural proposition and simply telling my story. To be sure, I have done both. In reviewing some things I was writing between 1995 and 2005 I found much Jōbish- babbling. (Augustan wrote his Confessions. Cummins wrote his Complaints) Beneath the words there were subtle questions regarding God’s goodness and His wisdom.
On the surface, the words may have seemed to come from an honest spirit of inquiry but in truth they were coming from a heart that was embittered and had struggled for years to know much joy in communion with God. What could be found in my heart was information, doctrine and strangely enough, strong convictions. When I opened my mouth or pressed the keys on my keyboard (often with great force), too often all that came out was a loveless, lifeless religious noise. (Check out Matt 6:23, 1 Cor 13:1)
Job, and the rest of us are sharing space with angels, demons and their commanders. We do not know who to blame at times for our plight. We all are familiar with this line of thinking: “If God is sovereign and He is good then why …. then we fill in the blank with what we have seen as apparent evidence to the contrary. Job and I had erred in how we were completing that sentence. Speaking from experience; If this supposed honest spirit of inquiry is hiding in our hearts then the hymns of faith we are singing are likely just us whistling in the dark.
Whether our personal darkness is perceived as an attack or the woodshed I believe Hebrews 4:13 is the wisest way for us to interpret and react. This brief sentence has been life to me. “...all things are open and laid bare to him whom we have to do“. If we will persevere through our dark circumstances in deference to Him, I am confident that we will emerge one day with first hand experience with God – truth that we can proclaim with authority as our own.
These earned-words which only we are positioned to share can often slip past barriers others have to sermonizing. Living-truth that matches character carries authority. Our story becomes a humble and disarming first hand account of God’s involvement in the affairs of men. Our stories are a visible reality that a good God is inclined toward men with mercy and kindness. Our lives and our words will resonate and awaken hope and faith in others.
I had acquired as much Bible knowledge, read as many books and listened to as many teachings as most, but like Job, in many ways, “I had only heard of Him by the hearing of the ear“. Usually what I had to say, with conviction mind you, was second hand and borrowed. However, after my season of darkness, like Job, I too retracted my questions and repented as best I could of my speculative babbling. Now, I fortunately have some degree of confidence in saying, “but now MY eye sees Thee“.
If we are in the darkness, let us give thanks because it is there where He will speak to us. What He whispers there in our ears can ultimately be proclaimed from the housetops.
Father, help us to each update our stories by listening in the midst of whatever our current darkness may be, and whatever we may perceive as its origin. May we emerge from our circumstances in faith having fresh confirmation in our hearts of Your goodness, Your kind intention and Your power. May both the spirit of our questions and our words be flavored by love, by boldness and with a joy that is appropriate for the sons and daughters of a great king such as You. Amen.